"Why I'm here? Am I a failure? Does anyone really need me?"
I was mentally surrounded by these questions and physically surrounded by sea, sun and sand. Sitting alone at this place away from home was not an occasion to admire the beauty of nature. I was completely lost in my thoughts or rather in my negative thoughts. Nothing in this world was seeming interesting.
"OK, I'm a failure, but it happens with most of the people. I can make a come back." My heart was consoling my mind this way. But it wasn't my heart's day. Mind was overpowering it. Past was already ruined, present was screwed up and future was looking unpredictable as usual.
There was an earthworm trying hard to make it to the soil but each time it's efforts were nullified by the strong waves.
"You are good for nothing." Again a voice from mind broke me down. "You don't deserve this life." I was constantly forced to take the extreme steps.
"Don't worry, you'll win over this situation. It is only a phase and will be over soon." I was again consoled by my heart.
The earthworm again came to the wet soil but the waves were still stronger than it's grip. It was pulled back again.
No hope was coming my way, not even a feeble one. I was trying hard not to cry but I had to drink the salty water that day.
Then suddenly I don't know how it happened but I was feeling more confident, more positive, more enthusiastic. May be because my mind was losing it's confidence against heart or may be because my heart wasn't that weak as it thought it was. Or perhaps the earthworm has won the battle against the waves and was crawling on the wet soil with it's head held high. Suddenly a story of a king and a spider was recalled in my mind. How the king got inspired from a little spider which was trying to climb to the web but failed six times. Then on the seventh attempt, it got there where it was supposed to be.
The waves seemed positive, inner and outer. Then I got up and walked through the wet sand. I had got my inspiration. It was quite obvious that I was leaving my footprints behind. But I didn't look back and kept walking. May be because from now on, I was prepared only to see the future and forget the past. May be, just may be.
Prompted at: Three Word Wednesday and
P.S. - My schedule is keeping me busy now a days. No wonder if I remain absent from blogging for a month or so. I'll try my best to post at least once a week and also read my fellow bloggers. And if I don't, please do understand and keep showing your love. Thank you bloggies.